This week's guest on the #IndustryTalk entertainment blog is none other than my girl- actress Amber Nicolle Gilbert. We met through previous actor and friend to the blog Dueal Andrews and I honestly must admit I admire this woman's hustle. Not only does she work, but she's constantly studying her craft and at the moment is learning stage combat. Let's sit down with Miss. Niccolle and find out what it's like being a black female actress in Hollywood and what we can expect from her in the future.




R|A: Thank you Amber for being apart of the #IndustryTalk blog family. So I guess my first question would be why acting and when did you know realize this was something you wanted to do?


A|N|G: At first playing basketball was my passion. I was very proficient in basketball as well as track and field. My dream was to play professionally for the WNBA. After high school, I ended up choosing another career to pursue which is acting. I feel that acting encompasses all aspects of humanity and that is something I want to be a part of.



R|A: You’ve recently just completed a short with friend to the blog Dueal Andrews titled Former Flames, what's the film about?


A|N|G: Former Flames is about two friends reminiscing on the good memories they had with each other in high school. Both friends end up having too much to drink and sleep together. This short was based off a true story that happened in my life. Dueal and I were high school sweethearts as well as good friends. I always wanted to collaborate with actor Dueal Andrews, so when given the opportunity, I took advantage.



R|A: Many times in this industry we befriend other entertainers and we want to create the art we want to see. What was it like working with your best friend, and what advice positive and negative would you say can arise from working with friends?



The best advice I can give to aspiring entertainers is NOT TO GIVE UP and to keep striving towards your goal.


A|N|G: It was a great learning experience working with someone on a project from the ground up. It definitely teaches you your strength and weaknesses in the business. My advice is just to have fun and definitely keep a cocktail or two around (ha-ha). You want to make sure that you take everyone’s vision into consideration. COMMUNICATION IS KEY without that you wont have a successful joint venture.



R|A: Do you plan on releasing your project online, or submitting to any festivals?




A|N|G: Yes, I will be releasing the short on my website and submitting it to festivalsonce post production is finished. Former Flames will be released sometime in the summer.



R|A: You have a very impressive resume, what would you say was your most favorite role to play and why?


A|N|G: My favorite role would have to be playing a lawyer. At times, I get type cast due to my tattoos. I work really hard to be taken seriously as an actress and prove to people in the industry that I can play other roles besides the “the tough chick” or “the seductive girl”. It is a great feeling knowing that people see me for my acting ability, not just based off my exotic appearance. Don’t get me wrong, I love my tattoos and will never get rid of them (they are a part of me). Surprisingly I get more roles and auditions that requires me to be “the girl next door” or “the conservative role”.


It takes determination to get to your destination.


R|A: What advice can you give aspiring entertainers?




A|N|G: The best advice I can give to aspiring entertainers is NOT TO GIVE UP and to keep striving towards your goal. There may be times when it is rough, but you can’t let that affect you. Always follow your dreams and if this is something you want to do, don’t let ANYONE discourage you. It takes determination to get to your destination. Most importantly, it is very important to stay focused and to have positive people who are going to motivate you. I strongly encourage aspiring entertainers to get involved in social networking events (it is so important to network). The last advice I will give is to collaborate with other actors and start making independent projects. The industry has changed so much over the years, so it’s a lot of ways to get noticed these days.



R|A: I understand you're currently taking combat training… What made you want to learn that technique and how often are you in class learning?




A|N|G: I am currently studying a Filipino martial arts called Pekiti Tirsia Kali. Action is one of my favorite genres in TV and Film. I want to be prepared when auditioning for roles that require combat training. Actresses who have done a lot of action films such as Zoe Saldana and Angelina Jolie are my biggest inspirations. I will love to have an opportunity to work in an action film. Combat training is not as easy as people think, it takes a lot of self-discipline and dedication. There is a lot to learn such as how to properly use a weapon on set, even throwing a punch or kick. In order to keep my combat training skills sharp, I train three times a week.



R|A: How do you prepare for a role?



A|N|G: When preparing for a role, I like to first read the entire script. After reading the entire script, I began to break down the scenes and develop character choices. I forget about being “the actress” and really focus on becoming who the character is. I want to be able to have that connection to the character and be in the moment. I like to find elements of the character that I feel are different and similar to me.





R|A: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?




A|N|G: In five years, I see myself being on a series also in action movies. Outside from acting, I will like to get into more writing and producing of TV and Film, I also want to develop affordable acting programs for aspiring actors/actresses.









R|A: This industry is very discouraging. What would you say was the most discouraging thing someone has said to you in the industry and how did you overcome that?

I forget about being “the actress” and really focus on becoming who the character is.




A|N|G: I haven’t really experienced someone specifically in the industry saying something negative to me. I will say that just being in the industry and dealing with the ups and downs can be very discouraging itself. Whenever I’m feeling discouraged, I remember my purpose and know that all of my hard work will eventually pay off.






If you watch the new hit medical drama Chicago MED then you've seen Mr. Roland Buck III. He's young, handsome, with a rising star in Hollywood. Graduating from USC with a degree in acting I thought his perspective on how he got into the industry would prove very helpful to all of you aspiring actors, writers, and producers. I sat with Roland at the W Hotel right in Hollywood to get an exclusive interview. Along with this interview are his tips on obtaining representation and how his start with that was tumultuous. So check out Mr. Buck and leave your comments below. #IndustryTalk 


R|A: What scene in that film (The Wood) made you decide this to go into acting?


R|B: Well it wasn't a particular scene but it was more like the opening scene the dude's name was Roland, so I was watching the scene with my mom, and I was like mom he's got my name so it made me pay attention a little more because I've never seen anyone with my name. So as I kept watching the movie I never saw people on TV or acting as a job. So I turned to my mom when the movie was over and was like ‘mom is that a job, can I do that?’ And she was like yeah, you can do anything you want to do. So I was like okay I want to be like Jim Brown- I want to be a football player, and I want to be an actor. You know, as a kid you want everything.



R|A: Before you went to USC to study theater you had attended North Carolina A&T university & then by your sophomore year had transferred to Texas Southern University. What were you studying at this time?


R|B: Yeah so I was recruited to play football at both universities, so I went on a football scholarship but I majored in radio-television and film. I figured that could be a good segue in so I was taking the timid route, and when I turned 18 I decided I really wanted to pursue acting professionally. But not as a major because most of my focus was on football. So I did radio-television and film, so that I could still be in front of the camera and still show my personality. But yeah I had to make a choice. So my love for football kind of shifted. There's a lot of politics in college football because there's a lot of money involved. So my love for the game shifted from that to acting and I knew I had to choose one thing. If I was going to make it as an actor I had to put my all into it. I couldn't do both. So I dropped out of school my senior year and moved here (Los Angeles). Yes in 2010.


R|A: You became one of seven finalist for the ABC discovers yearly competition. What type of monologue/scene did you perform and what was the feeling you had once you realized that you were one in over 7,000 who had auditioned?’s just as an actor you come close to a lot of stuff. So it didn’t work out. I was happy but it was just another thing that I almost got. It becomes like a routine.



R|B: Yes so they gave us a list of scenes (it wasn't a monologue) to put on tape. And the one I connected with was a dramatic one. It was kind of like an interrogation scene where I'm accused of killing my mom & dad, but the truth in the character that I found was that he didn't. So basically I'm fighting for my life. I was happy when I found out that I was one of seven. I had to do another tape. I chose to do a comedic one for the final round but um’ it's just as an actor you come close to a lot of stuff. So it didn't work out. I was happy but it was just another thing that I almost got. It becomes like a routine. (Looking back) if I would have gotten that, I would have been under contract with ABC and probably wouldn't have been able to do Chicago MED. So it works out.


R|A: What actors- past and present do you feel influence you most?


R|B: That's tough- Denzel (Washington) I met him twice, he's a humble dude. Very inspiring. He just gives that great energy off. He really took time to shake my hand, look me in the eyes, ask how I was doing. He gave me some advice. I saw him on broadway as well. One of my mentors Jason Dirden was in a play with him- A Raisin in The Sun. I was in New York for my showcase with USC my senior year and I got to see it (the play) and I got to meet him (Denzel Washington) again. Him, Leo (Leonardo Di Caprio). I really admire his body of work throughout his career. Joaquin Phoenix- I like him a lot, if I had to choose one more I’d say Don Cheadle. For sure his body of work. He studied at Cal Arts in Valencia. Those guys for sure I would love to have those hitters they have.


R|A: How'd you get cast for Chicago MED?


R|B: Regular audition process. My agent and manager gave me an audition that I had to self tape for. Because the casting director was in New York. The funny thing is I used to work at NBC as an intern in Talent & Casting. So that week that I got that audition I was actually helping my old casting director with the NBC Short Cuts Film Festival. I had never gotten an audition for them in the two years that I worked there or since I graduated. Not even with my very first Rep who was working there at the time. I told her about it and she was like okay send me your tape too- (the one you sent to your Reps and I'll make sure they look at it). I read the breakdown, self taped for it- and then a week later I booked it and I'm flying out to Chicago. That was a blessing.


R|A: Do you still get nervous auditioning or do you have a proven prep method to shake the jitters?


R|B: Well I think as long as you care about something, you're always going to have some kind of nerves, because that just shows you care about your work. I don't have nerves to where it's affecting my work negatively. I think just by doing you become more comfortable.


...I think as long as you care about something, you’re always going to have some kind of nerves...

R|A: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?


R|B: 5 Years would be my 11th year here in LA, definitely an established working actor, with a good resume and a good name still.


R|A: You studied theater in college- which do you prefer theater, or TV and film?



R|B: They're all different. I don't prefer one over the other. Theater is alive performance verses TV which is rapidly produced and film you spend a few months on it, but then you have to let it go. At least on stage you have that immediate response from the crowd. And you have complete control of the product on stage. It gives you a different rush- on stage, than television and film. I like them all. One day I hope to be known as someone who can win an Oscar, and Emmy, and a Tony award.


R|A: What would you say is the most difficult part about being in the industry?


The competition is between you and yourself. That’s all it is. That’s the toughest part.

R|B: Well from my experience, and because everyone is different. Just genuine people I would say. When you're first starting out everybody out here is saturated with people just wanting the glitz or the glam. Everybody wants to be a celebrity and not everyone is going to have your best interest in mind.  But once you start to rise and the cream of the crop starts to separate itself, the people that really want to be in this industry for the craft and the work that they're doing you have more genuine people. It takes a while to get to that level. So you have to have a little bit more discernment and positive energy. It's going to be a lot of no’s. A lot of people are negative. Hollywood is very saturated with image, the status, money, you know smoke and mirrors. Like in keeping up with this person and that person. The competition is between you and yourself. That's all it is. That's the toughest part.


R|A: I see you're with Rebel Entertainment Partners. Explain your steps to obtaining representation? Were you signed before or after college?

Photo Credit: Roland Buck The III  

Photo Credit: Roland Buck The III  

R|B: Yeah well it actually took me 4.5 years to get representation since I moved here. I couldn't even get an email when I first got here. After everything- being at USC and my showcase I had over 20 people come out to represent me. 20 meetings- you know I just always hustle. I didn't depend on USC’s name go get me anything. I really hustled, I would invite people out to my shows. Every play I had at USC. I went to IMDB Pro and researched people that I look up to like Michael B. Jordan & Shia Labeouf, young actors, young Hollywood. I look up their managers. I was given the advice that it’s better to get a manager first then an agent. Because they can help you get the agent. So they help mold your career, and are more personal with you. I got a list, I wrote emails, I made a flyer with head shots on it to promote myself for the show that I was in.


I would use that to promote myself. I'd tag my website at the bottom as well. I also printed out hard copies and mailed it to them. And then called. Not like all at once though. I would then write notes, on my feedback on the vibe I got back from them. Like if they were some assholes I would write that on their profile notes, and then I wouldn't call them anymore. But I'd make note of that. You know it's how you treat people, because one day you're going to see me again. I'm going to know. Some that were really nice to me would be like “I'm not looking for anyone right now, but let me know when you're a senior, or let me know when you have another showcase.” I just kept a log of that. One of my final shows before the showcase was ‘In The Blood’ it was a Susan Laurie Parks play, I had 5 managers come. Matthew Lesher- who I'm with right now came and I signed with him. He gave me options. He was like just come on let's go through this process together, if you don't feel like it's working out you're not under contract, and if I don't feel like it works out for me I don't have to keep you. And I was like that's perfect because I wanted to weigh my options at the showcase as well. So we did pilot season together in 2014 and I liked him a lot. He got me into some really good rooms, and he got people to come to my showcase.


Aside from what USC got me, he scheduled my meetings after. So I'm like yeah, I'm going to stick with this dude. He really believes in me. I stuck with him, and then I got a meeting with Rebel (entertainment partners). The interesting thing is- and you can have the exclusive on this… Is that… I didn't sign with rebel at first. For some reason the email didn't go through to set up a meeting. It went to the junk box. So I ended up signing with another agency (not gonna say they're name). But 3 months after that he got fired, and not telling me that he was fired from the agency. So you know sometime went by and I didn't get any auditions my manager was right on it. I never even knew that he was fired. He just told me when the situation was resolved. He was like you know what- this happened, this happened, this happened. But we got you a meeting with Rebel Entertainment Partners- they want to meet with you, and they're interested in signing you. So I went and met with them and I would have signed with them from the get go. But God works in great ways. That was my warm up that summer. Because right when I went to a meeting with the agency and they didn't want to keep me. I got with Rebel and they said that my old agency didn't know my worth. A few months later I tested for a CBS pilot. So that was a good thing.



R|A: What can we expect from your Character Noah Sexton who correct me if I'm wrong is siblings opposite YaYa Decosta?


R|B: They extended Season 1, 5 more episodes, so we have 18 episodes. I go back in two weeks to film episode 15. I'm a 3rd year med school Doctor. I like him a lot. YaYa is amazing to work opposite with. It's definitely some conflict in our family. I'm kind of the golden kid of the family. Only one child was allowed to go to MED school. We’re from Brazil, we moved here. Our last name was changed to Sexton to get us acclimated and Americanized. In episode 11 we get to speak Portuguese. Just a little bit. I hope we get to do more. I would love that. Basically one person could go to MED school. I was the boy so I was chosen to go. She's actually smarter than me. And she wants to be the doctor, but she took a back seat for me, sacrificed for me. She's always been there helping me out. Like I (Noah Sexton) was always leaning on her shoulders since I was a baby. And now I'm messing up. Which you guys will see. And basically it's like sink or swim for me. It's time for you to be a man, and if you want to be a good doctor then you need to man up and start taking responsibility.


R|A: When you get the script do you have to look up everything?


R|B: Yes I look up everything. The series regulars were actually able to spend two weeks in a hospital to shadow doctors. We have a doctor on set too to make sure that everything. We’re doing is right. At least as best as it can be, and then our pronunciations are right. Like Jeff he writes a lot of the episodes, he was a doctor before he stopped practicing medicine and he decided he wanted to be a screenwriter. So he's on set too and he's like “Roland- that's not how you say it…” Some of them like Collin have a lot harder dialogue. They ask questions, they do their research before, and they get it down. They're professionals for sure.


R|A: How many table reads does Chicago MED hold per episode before shooting?



R|B: Zero. We don't do table reads no. At least I've never done any table reads. Yeah it's quick, TV is quick. I mean a lot of shows do table reads. But they don't. We rehearse obviously- on set. But you know they know what you can do. They booked you for the job, they want you to reproduce that audition but make it even better.


R|A: What have you learned from working on a big budget show compared to indie films/projects?


R|B: It's the same really, it's just more money. Like they have more money to produce it. (I was hoping you would say the dressing room is better.) Yeah the trailer, and they fly you out first class, car service, more pay, a lot of stuff. (I feel like that gives you more time to study. On the flight go over your scenes, since you're not driving you can go over your scenes.) Yeah


R|A: Do you still take classes?


R|B: I haven't since graduating, but you know once I have the time and the finances I want to take some improv classes. But yeah you always should continue to study. I think the amount of auditions I get is already studying enough for me. I'm going in and out of character, reading scripts, and really exercising that muscle. Yeah so if you’re not doing anything then you should definitely be in classes. But I'm here to work and I'm working right now.


R|A: What advice would you give someone if they told you they wanted to be an actor?



R|B: I would say do you love it? Really check your intentions on why you want to be an actor. And if you do love it I would say have a strong faith, believe in yourself, and work. That's it. Build that solid foundation. I feel like every actor I look up to has a solid foundation that promotes longevity. Have range. Definitely study theater, take classes, watch movies, read books, read plays.


R|A: Top 3 music artist you're listening to?


R|B: Kendrick Lamar, Logic, and then… Drake. I like Drake’s music. (You kinda look like Drake) LOL yeah that's what people say. They used to call me little Drizzy back in the day.


R|A: Favorite food?



R|B: Steak… A nice steak. (Do you know how to cook?) Ah a little bit. I'm getting better.


R|A: Worst thing about living in LA?


R|B: Price- I would say. I mean you get used to that though.


R|A: What is your take on the #OscarSoWhite controversy?


R|B: I think there's a good point on both sides of it. I agree with Whoopi Goldberg's interview she did on The Talk. She had great points. We need people with big budget projects to make more content with minority's in mind.


R|A: Lastly what advice do you wish someone would have given you before entering the business?


R|B: I got a lot of really great advice. My mentor Jason Dirden has been great my whole career. His mom was my teacher at TSU (Texas Southern University). Something I wish I would have know- ah I guess the fickle people. I pretty much knew what to expect. It wasn't anything that was too much of a surprise to me. But many people talk but won't be about it. It can be friends like they want to make web-series together. They talk talk talk but don't do it. Or it can be people you've got a gig from and it doesn't work out. Like you can book a job but it might not never see the light of day. I have a feature film that still isn't out and it's been two years. So as an actor your power is in the 3 minutes in that audition or on each take. After that you have no control. That's something I'm learning now. Once you get executive producer credit, or you're producing your own films- if you have that desire; you have a bit more power. But really all you have as an actor is between action and cut. So you better make it good. Because you never know which take they're going to take, or if it'll ever see the light of day.

Photo Credit: Chicago MED

Photo Credit: Chicago MED





When we think about the entertainment industry we tend to forget the parts of this industry that navigates from the good Ol' American Family Values. I decided I wanted to interview a pornstar for my blog because just like us main stream actors they have to deal with a lot of bullshit just to step out of the margins. Although there are several reasons why the Adult Entertainment Industry and the Main Stream Industry differ the similarities are astonishing. For instance in both industries will you be discriminated against based on the color of your skin. You will be paid less, and disregarded more. But I wanted to go further. I mean statistically the United States and Germany are the two biggest porn watching markets, so with such high viewership ratings why in 2016 are porn stars not being given their due-respects? Read below as I talk to one of the hottest black gay porn stars in entertainment today. Coveted as the Verse King of porn. Welcome to the #IndustryTalk family... XL



R|A: What college did you study film and have you graduated yet?






X|L: I can't answer this question due to past experiences in which have made my public life turn private in a sense; In other words I can answer personality type question but I tend to keep my location discreet as I have had stalkers and random people looking to add drama to a place I still frequent. This is the second degree program I'm completing and I will graduate this fall.



R|A: What advice would you give someone who says they want to be a porn star? And then what advice do you wish someone would have given you?




X|L: I would honestly tell them to weigh out every extra income  (and no porn isn't my main source of income) option before they decided to join the adult industry. Mostly because the appeal of the industry changes for different people. For me, I currently am in a happier state being away from shooting scenes, appearances and being this "thing". Some people usually refer to me as popular or internet famous based on a few sex scenes. I appreciate it and all but really I enjoy being a regular guy. I hate the attention aspect of it. I'm shy and being an entertainer can be hard for me to do. I do porn because I gain relief in expressing myself sexually on camera. I do it for me not for the expectation that people will like me for it. So I would say if a model/future porn star felt that way too then perhaps it could be an enjoyable experience but if not I'd tell them to reconsider. I've honestly had really good advice given to me since the start of my porn life so its hard to say what I wish would've happened.  Those few negative experiences gave me boundaries.


...the appeal of the industry changes for different people.



R|A: I saw an interview from 2014 where you said you would like to direct and produce adult films. Are there any videos online with Dawgpound USA or Next Ebony that you've directed or assisted on?


I’m shy and being an entertainer can be hard for me to do. I do porn because I gain relief in expressing myself sexually on camera.



X|L: Not yet but hopefully soon.





R|A: I actually talked to two friends about asking to interview you. My best friend said to do it and my other friend (who's in the mainstream industry) was a bit judgmental which I felt was crazy because he watches adult films. Do you feel there's a double standard in the adult industry? I mean isn't watching and doing pretty much the same side of the coin?



People need something to talk negatively about in order to boost their own self-worth.


X|L: There is a double standard in the sense that people feel comfortable watching something but not actually doing it. Porn is usually searched for and used as a sexual release. We are humans and the need for sexual satisfaction is ever-most present; so when people judge pornography yet still get their nut from it; I realize then that hypocrisy rules their life. I cant take those people seriously. We do the same things, it's just your able to see mine.  Sex in general is very policed and censored. The same people that call me a promiscuous hoe can easily be the same people having 10 times as many sexual partners as me. What I do is not that much different from what they do behind closed doors. Some "professionals" feel they cant take me seriously or that Im beneath them since I deal business in a nefarious side of work, but it's really just to "outcast the freak." People need something to talk negatively about in order to boost their own self-worth. Most "professionals" I meet hire me personally and are some of the biggest freaks I've ever met.



R|A: What's your top 5 video games you can't live without?


X|L: ...

1) Super Smash Bros (Wii U)

2) Dead or Alive 5 Last Round (Xbox one)

3) Super Monkey Ball 2 (Nintendo Gamecube)

4) Bioshock 1 (Xbox 360)

5) Pokemon Stadium 2 (Nintendo 64)


And I have every console. I'm a huge game nerd.





R|A: Favorite Food?




X|L: Pan Seared Duck; sauteed wine-reduced creamier baby potatoes with a side of Ratatouille. Paired with Champagne.



R|A: You're from New Orleans- can you cook and what's your fave Creole/Cajun dish?



X|L: Cooking and eating are two of my favorite things to do on earth. I cook organic and fancy elaborate meals any chance I can get.

Favorite cajun dish is Jumbo Crawfish Etouffee with a Zydeco pasta.


R|A: Celebrity Crush?


X|L: Jussie Smollett


R|A: Top 5 music artist?






X|L: ...

1) Kelis

2) Bjork

3) Kyarypamyupamyu

4) Yelle

5) M.I.A



R|A: Where do you see yourself in 10 years?



X|L: Married, living on the West Coast working for a really lucrative visual editing company .




R|A: Have you ever thought about directing an adult series and putting it on your personal site or stream it on several platforms?



X|L: I thought about it, planned it, started filming it and realized I didn't want to get into it. The piracy centered around it is too extreme to control. It's harder than it looks and I have other projects I wanted to complete before I totally devoted myself to independent productions.


R|A: Craziest thing a fan has said to you or have done?






X|L: Made a public outcry at a restaurant because I looked so familiar.


R|A: Favorite life quote?


X|L: "The temporary aspects of life seem most important because as a human race we love to plan for the future without appreciating the present. You can actually do both if you aim to make yourself as happy as you possibly can for the rest of your life." - Unknown

The temporary aspects of life seem most important because as a human race we love to plan for the future without appreciating the present. You can actually do both if you aim to make yourself as happy as you possibly can for the rest of your life. - Unknown


R|A: Langston Hughes or James Baldwin and why?


X|L: Langston Hughes; I've read more of his work.


R|A: How do you prepare for a scene as a bottom? Diets, douching, what? (And then) How do you prepare for a scene as a top?




X|L: I visualize myself getting penetrated... make sure I'm as anally clean as possible, and I rarely eat before I bottom. (Topping) I think about the size of the ass I'll see that day; The rest can be seen online. When I top seriously with someone I'm into I try to make sure we have a good vibe.


R|A: Have you done bareback films? If so do you take prep or do they make you guys show up to set with your latest test results?


X|L: I've done two scenes. We both were tested prior to shooting and we have to prove test results before shooting.


R|A: Is there rapid testing on porn sets?


X|L: Some studios have them yes.


R|A: What's craft services look like on an adult film set? (I guess water for bottoms, LOL)


X|L: Water, Food, Lounging area. It depends on the studio.






R|A: French Toast, Waffles, or Pancakes?


...connecting with your scene partner is the key to a good scene.

X|L: Pancakes are more nostalgic for me.


R|A: Favorite fruit?


X|L: Mango


R|A: Favorite bible quote? You're from the south so I'm assuming you went to church? I read most people in Louisiana are Catholic?


X|L: I am from the South and I was raised in church but I don't hold any scripture above the other. Individuals have their own interpretation of Gods Word. I have my own and I prefer to keep my faith separate from my porn life.


R|A: I love how you own that you truly enjoy being an adult actor. Does anyone in your family know?


X|L: Thank you, and yes a few people in my family know but they don't view me any differently; at least not anymore.


R|A: What's something no one ever tells you about making an adult film?





X|L: That connecting with your scene partner is the key to a good scene.


R|A: Will you branch off into merchandise- such as sex toys? Or would you do something like Kandi Burress's Bedroom Kandi line? Maybe an XL fragrance?


X|L: I would like my own jock-strap line.


R|A: Many celebrities are into giving back. Whether it's because they feel it in their hearts or for publicity and tax write-offs. Do you currently volunteer anywhere or are you perhaps planning on getting involved in the LGBT community as a mentor?






X|L: I currently mentor a few younger models who are looking to get into the industry. It's mostly me telling them It's not for everybody.


R|A: Why do you think adult entertainment is so stigmatized when adult entertainment sites receive more monthly visitors than Netflix, Amazon and Twitter combined. Statistics showed that by 2015 the adult entertainment business became a 2.8 billion dollar industry- America leading the exportation followed by Germany?


X|L: Sex can be quite constructive for the soul. As Ace Rockwood said "Humans share energy and release that energy". There's a bad side to everything, I just aim to find the good.  Labels, Judgements and Social Norms create the stigma. People assume that your fucking everyone, multiple times a day. When in reality you work a 9 to 5 just like them, attend college, have loving parent(s), have a significant other, have self-respect but the only difference is you take a plane to get sexually liberated for a day (depending on how often you shoot).


R|A: (I know in one interview you mentioned how you were out in high school and that the experience was challenging.) Do you feel more comfortable in life at this point & could you possibly share an experience that you've overcome? (Many young people see the negative in life and do not realize that we are indeed put here for a reason and that life always gets better.)






X|L: I feel pretty comfortable with who I am now but it wasn't always that way. I've had to learn from rough experiences and use them to my advantage to set clear goals of what I wanted for myself.


R|A: (I read an interview where you mention you were very depressed and at one point suicidal because of things happening in the industry.) Can you tell readers and aspiring porn stars what triggered those feelings?


X|L: I became tired of being an object. I was successfully working in this industry where everyone saw me sexualized but not humanized. I made good money and maintained a certain image but I wasn't happy. There was so much ass-kissing, body worship and materialism around me. I was becoming a product and not a human. I noticed I couldn't naturally smile anymore, I grew tired of fake-ness and it made me feel terrible to keep up the act. Some promoters were shady and desperate to market off of this "thing" I barely recognized. I was losing myself inside an empty industry of many faces. Selling myself literally to the idea that I'm "something" based on this one element of my life but I do many things.



Porn is not even 25% of who I am. I had to find meaning in being me and not XL. XL is a job and thats it. The real me, gains weight, goes to art museums, finds comfort in home life and ironically is very shy. I'm not meant to live in the gym, engage in societal norms of comparing/contrasting physical attributes, partying 24/7, or being what someone tells me to be. I am who I am alone; imperfectly blissful. Countless amounts of people trying to use me, a friend's death and a fake image I worked so hard to create (now destroyed) triggered those feelings. There's a darkness behind the scenes that the audience doesn't see and I almost let it consume me. It's still a struggle today but I'm in a much better place mentally to where I feel confident in accepting myself flaws and all.

There’s a darkness behind the scenes that the audience doesn’t see and I almost let it consume me.



R|A: (In my experience of acting in film and web-series I remember reading so many opinions. It was like these people who didn't know me either loved me which made me feel great or hated everything about me and wondered why I was alive.) How do you deal with criticism of any kind?


X|L: I learned It's important to care about what you think of yourself over the opinions of others. Most people cannot make valuable statements about your life if they havent lived it or expereienced it. Accept the good criticism with the bad and know that your worth is more valuable than anything anyone could ever say.


R|A: To end I must ask who are you voting for for the presidential elections?


X|L: Possibly Bernie Sanders